How caregivers can better deal with caregivers' stresses Part 6

6.  As a caregiver, put yourself high on the priorities list.  Serious illness affects the entire family, not just the individual needing care.  Caregiver organizations are quick to point out that caregiving causes stress and caregivers need to take care of themselves.  

The American Heart Association gives this advice to caregivers:  “Pace yourself.  This is a marathon, not a sprint.  Seek sustenance and help along the way.”  http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/Caregiver/RealityCheck/BeRealisticThinkPositive/Be-Realistic-Think-Positive_UCM_301771_Article.jsp#.TxtJBvkqjC8   Every caregiver needs to consider himself and his needs so he doesn’t become stressed out, worn out and burned out.   

Information and support groups can be found at reputable caregiver’s organizations such as the National Family Caregivers Association at http://www.nfcacares.org and the Family Caregiver Alliance at www.caregiver.org  Organizations such as the Alzheimer’s Association at http://alz.org, the American Cancer Society at http://cancer.org and American Heart Association at http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/ also provide valuable, reliable information and support for families dealing with those illnesses. 

How caregivers can better deal with caregivers' stresses Part 5

5.  What resources and help can you get?  Do you need to hire help/utilize your helpful, willing volunteers? Can meals be delivered by Meals on Wheels/Senior Citizen’s programs?  Have you heard of 211 network?  

The 211 Network is an American resource center which provides information.  The 211 network is available 24/7 and provides free information to the caller.  The 211 network is a grassroots effort, usually funded by the United Way or other service agency.  The 211 network is accredited nationally by the Alliance of Information and Referral Systems who determines the standards by which a 211 network operates.  The 211 network can be accessed by calling 2-1-1 or on-line at http://www.211.org/.  By entering a zip code and/or city, you can access services/resources which are available to caregivers.

A second resource that caregivers can access is an Area Agency of Aging at   http://www.eldercare.gov/Eldercare.NET/Public/Index.aspx or 1-800-677-1116. 

How caregivers can better deal with caregivers' stresses Part 4

4.  Recognize that no one can do it (caregiving) alone.  How many family members and close friends can contribute to caregiving?  Can tasks and responsibilities be divided among family members?  The primary caregiver can make a list of needed help and supportive family and friends can pick their chores.  

For example, daughter who lives close to Dad may be the person who checks on Dad every day.  Another daughter volunteers to clean house and bring fresh cooked meals every Saturday.  Daughter who lives 1000 miles away flies in several times a year to help out and relieve her sisters for respite breaks.  A grandson takes over the yard work.  This family hires a neighbor lady/certified home health aide to check on their dad periodically throughout the day while the daughters are working.  By working together, this family honors their dad’s wishes and supports each other. 

How caregivers can better deal with caregivers' stresses Part 3

3.  If your loved one (who needs caregiving) is mentally capable, include him in planning his care.  Does Dad want to continue living at home?  Does he have a plan for how that can be accomplished when all his family members have jobs?   

What does he want done if he had a heart attack?  Does he want compassionate care but no heroics? Does he want CPR and full resuscitation efforts on the way to and continued after he arrives at the hospital?   Does he have a living will and durable power of attorney for health care?  If he is mentally capable, these decisions are his to make and he needs to help make plans for his care.  Caregivers may find their loved one changes his mind about what wants to have done.  As a person becomes older, frail and poor health develops, he may decide he wants compassionate care (not CPR and resuscitation efforts). 

How caregivers can better deal with caregiver's stresses Part 2

2.  Caregivers should learn about their loved one’s diagnosis.  Psychologist Dr Barry Jacobs says it well in his book, The Emotional Survival Guide for Caregivers:  “not having basic knowledge about the patient’s illness is like driving some pitch-black country road without headlights and being jolted by every dip and thrown by every curve.  Without understanding the rigors of the terrain, you’re hard-pressed to prepare yourself for the ride or even judge whether you’re up to the journey.  It’s reckless.”  [Jacobs, Barry J, The Emotional Survival Guide for Caregivers, (New York:  Guilford Press, 2006), 39.] 

Two of my family members have recently been diagnosed with heart disease.  What does a diagnosis of congestive heart failure mean?  How can my loved one best take care of his health?  Where should my family go for information?  First, his doctor will give pertinent information which my family needs.  Second, my family can get information and understanding from reputable websites like American Heart Association at http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/ Mayo Clinic at http://www.mayoclinic.com/ or WebMD at http://www.webmd.com/.  Use reputable organizations for accurate information and support groups.